When I got back to work this afternoon post-dance-mob, I was so giddy and energetic that I decided I didn't need my afternoon cup of tea. Adding tea to exuberant silliness, I reasoned, would only have made me bounce off the walls all afternoon and not get any work done. It was probably true, but as it was, 3:00 found me exhausted, miserable, and yes, not getting any work done. Somehow I couldn't even summon the brain cells to identify the lack of tea as the problem until 5:00 when I was leaving. I just sat at my desk for two hours picking up piles of work, starting them, putting them down and starting other piles of work, and occasionally dragging myself out of my chair to run an errand somewhere else in the library. My internal monologue all afternoon was long periods of silence interrupted by "god I'm so tired" and "this sucks".
It's deeply alarming to me that something as minor as a cup of tea can fuck with my moods this much. It's not like I'm in cocaine withdrawal here; I've just skipped an afternoon beverage that most of the country's adult population thinks of as mild and relaxing, but suddenly I'm unable to function in the manner to which I'm accustomed. All I can really think is that I'm glad I called off my drug experimentation when I did, because I apparently came factory-ready for dependency. My to-do list already makes me want to crawl back into bed with the covers over my head, even when it's just paperwork and laundry; I don't need to wake up one morning and find "quit meth" on it.
Um. Here's a parakeet in a bowl of noodles.
Posted by dianna at April 6, 2007 06:12 PM