March 07, 2005

Come back as a Jersey cow.

My mood today is the color of my shirts: black, black, and dull dark maroon. I've been smoldering and sparking since I woke up this morning.

With this level of background rage everything else is just a distraction. I glared at the woman holding her book 2 inches from my head on BART, but there was no real feeling in it. When she got off and I could move my head again, though, I found my glare redirected to the poster at the end of the train car. As I watched, it resolved itself from a minor irritation to full-blown offense. It was a perky JetBlue poster, advertising the same things that perky JetBlue posters always advertise: cheap fares, free TV, and leather seats, with a catchy tagline in large print to get your attention. "Welcome," this one told me, "to the age of enflightenment."

Astounding. I never knew that leather seats and enlightenment went together, you murdering mother fuck. Now that I know, it's changed my outlook completely. Specifically, I'm devoting 40% more of my time and brainpower to hoping that you die and return as a cow. I'm just certain you'll experience a deep spiritual awakening when some dickhead pulls your skin off to make an airplane seat because he thinks it's classy.

Posted by dianna at March 7, 2005 09:26 AM
Comments

No, no, enflightenment. Just like Foltaire always said, "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities in the name of in-flight TV."

Posted by: sean at March 7, 2005 09:47 AM

Foltaire. Heheh.

Posted by: Dianna at March 7, 2005 09:50 AM

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